This article and the insightful, personal replies to it are why I love Jezebel. This lurker has learned and grown so much over the past few years because of all of you. Thanks.

Here’s the problem, though: there’s always been a wasted marketing opportunity for the Saturday between the crucifixion/Good Friday and the resurrection/Easter Sunday. The three days ought be a trilogy, but instead it’s just an awful beginning of torture porn and a triumphant ending that conquers death, with none of…

Happy Easter, y’all. My local wine bar is having an adult Easter egg hunt later on this afternoon. I have no idea what it entails but I’m there.

Et tu, Bruschetta?

Not to mention: Who would have though a junked out crazy person would make such shitty music? I mean, look at Steve Earle? I mean seven marriages, two kids that don’t speak to him and some jail time, but the music is solid.

His house was built by Thomas Kinkade.

Nicholas Sparks’ house is filled with paintings by Thomas Kinkade.

fuck cancer

As a Lizard Person, Fiorina presumably has a cloaca.

Can’t. Take. The. Fremdschamen!

Millennials are each a special flower.

It’s a Tribble!

I’m crying

I feel like a moron for laughing as hard as I did at this.

This is gonna sound like a shit suggestion but I really do like the Great Clips by the Qdoba in Carmel. I NEVER go up there except to see my psychiatrist and to get my hair done. NOT the one in Broad Ripple, that one’s a shit show.

And David Greene is my radio boyfriend, so I’mma kick her ass.

Bangs cut off your face, your wonderful, beautiful face,

alternately, bangs hide my forehead. my horrible, tall and expansive forehead.

Counterpoint Exhibit 1 - I cut my own bangs a few weeks ago, because they cover at least two of my fivehead, and they look goddamned awesome.

I was done with the church in 5th grade, my parents asked me to keep going through Confirmation, then it was my decision. Thanks for the gifts everyone!