If'n you truly want a righteous chill courtesy of a Kong, you'd do yourself a great favor to start here:

Hm. Kyle Smith? Never heard of him. But at least now I know Ed Anger's real name.

I'll have you know it's totally easy for me to play a shitty DVD rip on my 50" HDTV, thank you. That's the minimum size at which you can truly see the shitiness.

Witcher 3 is so fantastic. I think the voice cast deserves some ensemble recognition.

Shaq-Fu: A Legend Reborn

Well, since I have nowhere else to place these thoughts: say what you like about Hanna-Barbera, and it surely varies in quality, but 'Devlin' was the most boring goddamn TV show ever produced.

OK. They won. I was totes marking for Roman two nights in a row, and I was totes happy he won.

I have no personal interest in this telefilm, but it sounds like it was a success. And for that I am very happy for Dolly Parton proper, cuz she is a badass motherfucker and all praise be to her.

I've got some words about current WWE, mostly about the virtues of the anti-Authority Wyatt face turn I've been fantasy booking for many months. But I'm gonna skip those.

Oh my god. Thank you Fargo. That goddamn UFO. I haven't laughed such a satisfying laugh in a mighty long time.

I laughed, I cried! It was better than Cats!

Yeah, they really dillydallied way too long on Enzo & Cass, and maybe they truly weren't ready. But Gable & Jordan are goddamn geniuses, they're beyond ready, and their match(es) versus Dash & Dawson are sure to be sick. So sick.

What it is I really wanted was for them to, as is their wont, cut to commercial in the middle of that Roman Reigns time challenge match, and just show us the finish on replay.

Ian Curtis remains the wise one.

Shout out Sturgill Simpson, singer of that country cover of When In Rome's The Promise, and total cosmic cowboy supreme badass.

"Nothing moves the Blob!"

Stupid bitch.

Hey, I said last week that Virgil committed suicide to serve as Kevin's spirit guide, and you all just laughed at me.

So, maybe Virgil offed himself as a last act in life so that he might be a guide to Kevin in the other place? He didn't really get specific about the whole guide gimmick, right? Virgil is experienced there as I understand it.

Geez louweeze. What a gut wrenching, heart rending, mind melting experience. TV, everybody. Everybody say thank you.