Really, all this needed was to have DAN SNYDER written in 40 point font. Like Dallas, Washington will never be a particularly good team with current ownership.

Snyder should rename the team the Bullets. It's not like any other DC-based pro sports team is using it or anything.

Who would have guessed watching the DS9 pilot that the thieving little Ferengi child would have the most poignant story 7 years later, and in the holsuite of all places.

I approved of this thing that I'm approving of.

And then there's this.

When did Jesse 'The Body' Ventura start calling NFL games?

"And what you fail to realize is my ship... is dragging mines!"

Those exist. They're called cars.

Why was the singer of the Goo Goo Dolls conducting the interview?

Intoxicated

We have one woman cast member who isn't conventionally attractive and doesn't have gigantic cleavage.

They should call Dwayne Johnson to stand there. He hasn't turned anything down in years.

A-Rod, particularly a cooling one, would have served Japan well 2 years ago.

The last time anybody was that excited about a royal snatch, Queen Latifah was in a committed relationship.