I always click on Midweek Madness thinking, “He can’t top last week...” AND THEN HE GOES AND DOES IT. The Kardashian mucus plug is what did me in today.

Do you hear the sound of 1,000 divorce lawyers praying this becomes a trend because it’s easy fucking money?

Congratulations on your or your loved one’s graduation or just your awesome ability to view things that are awesome. I’m jelly!

I’ve got the mid-afternoon snackies right now and that cupcake description is killing me.

How old is he now? Please tell me you will tell this story at his wedding.

This is the cutest thing in the world. I love that your cupcake and sweater match!!!

My BFF had a destination wedding in Mexico, and she served tres leches cake. I still die thinking about how fucking delicious it is.

Yup. That’s the true sign of a person who got a tattoo as a conversation starter and not because they wanted to wear that art for themselves.

Rolling Stone publishes a tone-deaf cover? Hold on, I need to find my smelling salts for this outrageous surprise.

Didn’t even have to watch the video. Thank you sir!

Sorry Madeleine, but based on that title, they’re trolling some angsty middle school hallways for a ghost writer who can really nail Naya’s tone. Your only chance is to pose as an eloquent 8th grader.

You said it perfectly. I’m totally Team Tattoo Artist on this. Do your research before you walk into a shop and if the artist says he/she’s not comfortable with doing what you want, find a new shop. You’re paying for their talent and they have the right to be selective of what work they take on.

Adam Harris FTFW. I could only hope that the man I marry is that moved when he sees me the day we get married. Good for him for shutting that Twitter dickhole down.

Is that photo from recently? Because holy hell, she looks the same as she did in “From Dusk Till Dawn.” Someone get her, Keanu Reeves and like, Gabrielle Union (I’m sure there’s others, but I remember them in particular from when I was a pre-teen to now well into my 20’s) in the same room and figure out how their…

Matthew Perry, you’re wrong.

Kara, this column is on fucking POINT today. So good. And thank you for refusing to even address the Jessica Lange/Caitlyn Jenner faux controversy. Everybody was crying shade in the comments.

I did, I just haven’t seen that season yet! Nightman is my ringtone.

I had never seen this before and I am just......... SO HAPPY TODAY NOW.

You’re right, that initial reveal of your virginity is the scariest moment, but I think that conversation, especially when you’re having it with the right person, helps alleviate a lot of the fears it brings up, as well. I was a nearly mid-20’s virgin because I hadn’t dated. I had gone on like, four dates, maybe.…