Good.

The real deflategate

Riding a pair of crazes, my partner and I threw a Hamilton-themed gender reveal party. We hired two local urchin children to participate in the reveal and dressed them in blue- and pink-tinted period garb. After an acai bowl brunch, our guests gathered in the courtyard. Both children – the boy child playing Alexander…

You take your victim as you find them. Once you start trying to hurt them it doesn’t matter whether they had the constitution of the Incredible Hulk or are as frail as a housebound great grandmother. The excuse that they only intended to smack her around a little matters zilch, because they still wanted to smack her…

An accident would be if she tripped her without meaning to. She may not have meant to kill her, but she meant her harm and that harm resulted in death.

Yes and this girl intended to cause her physical harm - it's not like she accidentally dropped a book on her head.

Just because you didn't mean to kill someone (while you were FIGHTING them) doesn't mean you didn't do anything wrong.

Well, now, wait a minute. This statement is from the defendant’s attorney, and it’s all sorts of weirdness. The other girls repeatedly hit her in the head and torso. The defensive attorney even used the phrase “consensual” when referring to a fight. No no. That’s not a word you can use for that. Then, he said it was…

Well the medical examiner came straight out and said that even though Amy Joyner had a heart condition, the fight and getting assaulted caused her heart to fail. So here’s hoping that counts and doesn’t allow for leniency.

I’m a lawyer. I never make arguments like that. Mostly because THEY ARE DUMB AND THEY DON’T WORK.

Right? The fact that she had a heart condition doesn’t mean that these girls didn’t kill her. If they hadn’t attacked her she’d still be alive.

Yes! I couldn’t remember what it was called. This issue is in no way unprecedented. That lawyer can get outta here with that intro to criminal law bullshit.

I hope that this does not get the girls/girls who jumped and beat her any leeway. This is consequences not accidents. My heart breaks for that young girls family.

Um. This fucking guy. What a quack.

Eggshell skull rule, motherfuckers.

The girl being primarily charged, the one who may be charged as an adult, will see a maximum of 8 years. The other 2, including the one who filmed it, may get no more than a year. It doesn’t matter that she didn’t know about the heart condition. It’s pretty common to charge people with murder in those cases. A 16 year…

Does it make it better or worse that I too was wrong about what she was saying, but I had always thought it was “are you early?”, and she was just weirdly not pronouncing the R very much?

Sigh I don’t like to bring this up much, especially on the internet but I’m anonymous here and talking about it does help sometimes so here goes (I expect my run-on sentences/grammar will be even worse than usual because I’m just gonna get this out and not look back at it so please bare with me).