“Trying to explain a force like Mariah would be like trying to explain the wind.”

This is what bothers me about the current leadership in the Democratic Party: they try to be nice and they try to be reasonable, and all that comes of it is that they get fucked over when it matters most, especially when we all know that the other side would not provide the same courtesy. Gore should have fought…

I know it’s wrong, but I really wish it was legal to smack people giving the Nazi salute in the head with a baseball bat.

My favoritest joke of all time:

Guy’s waiting for an elevator. The bell dings, door opens.
Kenny G walks out, taps him on the shoulder, says “Man! That club rocks!”

The Kenny G Little Pigs is the scariest children’s story.

They’re the kind of folks who jerk off to “The Man In The High Castle.”

Naw, he’s mostly interested in the guy behind the shooter. What’s his name, the real-life Pepe...

oooooooof. it hurts because it is true

The leftover pot roast, had me lol.

There’s no way Hillary rolled up a three million plus margin in the popular vote, which is where this is heading, and lost PA, WI & MI. Every other time someone won the electoral college but lost the popular vote, it was by a squeaker, by a few hundred thousand votes, but Hillary might have won the popular vote by…

I don’t think she is going to ask for a recount but I hope to be proven wrong. Still if she does - we are in for something truly, truly ???? There isn’t a word to describe it.

I mean she literally has nothing left to lose while the country is standing to lose everything.

I’ve been avoiding these stories, because they’re too hopeful and 2016 has taught me that hope is lost.

I loved to refer to Deadmau5 as “Deceased Rodent”.... not sure if that’s gratically correct but his spelling is much worse.

All I can think of when I hear Ted Cruz’s name is that tonsil stone he spat out and then ate on-air. hurrrk...

Ted Cruz has all the things he had coming to him being cashed in at once. I don’t feel even a little sorry him.

Politico reports that he is considering former Democratic Rep. Harold Ford, Jr. for transportation secretary

This lady was selling apples on the off ramp by me the other day... Looks legit.