He’s like Dallas fans’ favorite uncle who beats his wife on rare occasions, infrequently enough for the entire family to act like nothing bad ever happened.

Shirts with sleeves would be a solid start.

I just knew in my cold, black heart that Rick Steves had to be an asshole. Any specific story come to mind, or was he just an all-around shithead?

This is about Judge Reinhold. He is a humongous dickhead. Here’s my story.

“Those dick pics and audio messages of me drunk and crying are proof that your son’s future means the world to our program. God I love the way you sweat.”

“I wish someone would felicitate me.”

Or aspire to be the team opponents describe as “a real class act” and then mention how good the local food is.

Probably for people who still add “and a half” to their age.

The good ol’ American tradition of denying someone else’s outlet for expressing opposing opinions so long as you know you won’t be held accountable. Boy do I love this country from sea to shining sea.

Boy’s gawt that farr in em!

Michelle Rhee is to pragmatic education reform what Elizabeth Holmes is to the promising future of a transparent, intellectually honest, sexually and ethnically diverse Silicon Valley.

Goff looks like a home-schooled Mennonite about to tell his freshman biology professor how the world really works. It’ll take the rest of the season to break that level of confidence.

Swear to god he acts like someone rubbed their balls on one of his precious Little Debbie’s every time a team scores against him.

Then you start noticing all the other things he does when he doesn’t know how to feign emotion. Pretty much ruined Waking Life for me too.

On the Media had a podcast extra with a refreshing, if ultimately despairing, take this morning. Definitely well worth a listen.

Half the people I’ve seen this morning looked on the verge of tears, and the other half were smirking like the fire they just started was beginning to take hold.

Kill, Marry, Fuck with NPR personalities. I’ll go first.

Ben’s Chili Bowl made taking visiting friends and family to D.C. proper tolerable. And people-watching around that place was on point.

+1 for Encino Man-themed shade

Good god, bringin’ that fire.