Summer is the suckiest time to grill. Grilling in the goddam winter beats grilling in the summer. There is nothing worse than going to a summer cookout and standing around a hot grill in 90 degree heat getting eaten by mosquitos.

Pro tip: in the summer, leave them in the car with the keys in the ignition and tell them it’s easy to figure out how to turn the car on and turn on the AC. Teaches them independence.

Don’t forget to hate on Peter Franchot, the miserable little toady, for all the time he’s wasted pushing this stupid idea. Franchot and Hogan both have made it crusades to screw over public school kids in as many ways as they can.