I assume he didn’t want to risk an injury that would prevent him from giving his post-game press conference in the really cool hat he had picked out.

The laptop that Cam Newton stole in college is technologically more advanced than 95% of North Carolina. 

I’m willing to give Carmelo the same opportunity to prove himself that he gave Jeremy Lin .......seriously, fuck Carmelo

I mean, I guess I’ll just repeat what I said. He was in Vic Fangio’s defense. Fangio’s schemes, by design, do not give up big plays.  He also had the benefit of having the #1 run defense and one of the top pass rushing front sevens in the league.  

I want it to get to the point where Lions fans feel sorry for them

Mark my words, it’s going to get real bad.

Rex Ryan would nurse those feet back to health. Day and night, tirelessly working. Without thanks, without pay, without reciprocated feelings.  That is what love is.  Being there when you aren’t asked to be.  Seeing the foot for what it is ON THE INSIDE and not for what it is on the outside, because that’s where true…

it depends on several things: where you are in your current contract, years of service, accolades like all nba, how many cups of coffee you can drink without murdering someone, how many times you’ve driven the autobahn, if you can parallel park downtown in Seattle, how long you can hold your breath, it’s all right…

The Bills once being Super Bowl contenders is like the Republican Party once championing black civil rights: a historical fact that seems like a myth and also something that will never, ever happen again. 

How many more have to die before we finally do something about Sean Penn?

That bus is a sad monument to a sad story.

This is what the photographer walked into:

that’s a jerk-off station

ok, but in my defense, I’m an idiot

“Oh sure, he can call them savages, but when I do it...”

“Fucking get better...” Boone yelled this at his anterior cruciate ligament years ago. It didn’t work.

This is Boone’s managerial equivalent of The Homer, I think. Holy shit what a display. What a fountain of memes.

I remember back in 2002 when Mike Piazza had to tell us all he was a savage in the box.

You know, Boonie is on to something here. For as Rousseau said in his Discourse on Inequality, “In fact, the real source of all those differences, is that the savage lives within himself, whereas the citizen, constantly beside himself, knows only how to live in the opinion of others.” That is, in “the box” the batter…

I think “Roommate while you’re in the room trying to sleep” deserves a separate, higher entry.