Congrats Spiegel... for that I give you... Coco and her two mutts...

Congratulations, Mr. Spiegel, on COTD! I would like to gift you with a Tesla which this lovely lady will deliver, without incident, as she is always on her toes.

I hate to use the same old tired ‘did Nazi that coming’ line, but if it’s ever going to fit as a response to something, this is it.

Little do you realize that the turn signal stalk is actually a secret anti theft device. In the event that it is ever used the car automatically alerts the authorities that the vehicle has been stolen.

One New Yorker says he wants to build a wall, and the entire city starts attacking walls.

Any y’all need a ride to Mordor? She’s quite enough to getchya past the Naaazgul and hell, she’ll probly float on lava, too, never seen nuthin’ she cain’t do.

Don’t even think about making that comment. Don’t.

To only end up popping his Bayonne to play some Hackensack.

This has got to be the greatest car commercial ever (it’s real), courtesy of Rhett and Link in their heyday. Their series of home-grown commercials is amazing. Sometimes I wonder how ol’ Rudy is making out these days. Godspeed, man.

WE ARE HERE TO BOOST [claps] YOU UP

JJEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSUUUSSSS!!!!!

I grew up in a Pharma home. I got to hear the adage, “The most expensive [medication] is the one that didn’t work,” be it antibiotic or whatever so many times I can’t even fathom attaching a count to it.

Looks like he wasn’t quite the traveling Salsman.

Written five six five

Suzuki Turbo.

My dad commuted almost every day of my parents’ 46 years together. He’s still waiting for parole.

FALSE FLAG! FAKE NEWS!!! FAKE NEWS!!!

Because

“Sure Barry drew a red line in Syria, but these white lines are rad!”

Everybody always forgets my favorite part: “and bodies in ditches”