I would gnaw my own leg off to never see Scott Pruitt’s fuckface on a Takeout post again, thankyouverymuch.

Had a Pimp My S’Smore Project a few years back. Did it in the office over Sterno.

The past week, made manifest in goose form.

Never underestimate the power of watching humans expertly mingling your salad for stoking the appetite and inspiring rivers of drool.

Plenty for whom, exactly?

Loved our “Egg Boss” so much, we bought another one (not sure of the brand) that cooks a dozen at a time. If you’re on low-carb, high protein, my god, it’s perfect and makes them soooooo easy to peel. Even does a nice job on the frittata, omelet and soft-boiled eggs. I’ve got an Instant Pot. This works better.

I look a wobbly table as a sign a restaurant is not detail-oriented.

If you could, expand on this and pair it up for Lifehacker on how to give a eulogy.

Came T . H . I . S . close to making this purchase:

The bleak doom of all good things in this terrible psycho-capitalist hell-society we have made is to be processed and metabolized into an inert clot of blind, gray, mindless nano-goo by precisely the kind of antiseptic, hyper-rational, ahuman actuarial math on display here:

That does it. I’m retaliating with a 1-star tornado taking out Cafe Pushkin in Moscow. I’m about to find a thick, Belarusian hair in my Chicken Kiev.

Color me anal - ew - but those jars of pickled okra were pickled poorly. The level of brine is way off (unless they’ve been opened and consumed partially). It should be up to the neck of the rim, not so far down that the okra is exposed.

Hear me now and believe me later:

Ovechkin’s Yelp reviews look like this:

Should have tagged it #ForModelingPurposesOnly

Flatten the skins between two hot cast iron skillets.

Guess whose meal mysteriously fails to materialize next time...?

Has anyone ever actually enjoyed a group order? Someone always gripes about price/temperature/time for delivery.

Will have to try it, but my epiphany came from one of those hacky looking egg steamers that - gasp - work like a charm. Not only will they make great hard-boiled eggs (yes, a dozen at a time), they also have poaching trays that take all of the guesswork out.

What’s the play here?