Here’s my standby:

I can’t finish 13 pieces, so in have then cut it into 7.

Nope, we’re talking 10+ seconds pauses with no indication that they’re done speaking. Like the sloth in Zootopia.

* the link you posted goes, ironically, to a starter kit. . .

Mrs. Costco just rolled her eyes; Old Man Costco thinks a 5 foot hose is longer than average.

This is looking at the top two apps — MFP and LostIt are both bigger than SharkPeople — MFP significantly so.

Closing on on 500 days on my current MFP streak, for what it’s worth...

??? So if it’s OK that the raw materials are just “a guess”, how do you expect things made of them to be more accurate?

It’s still there. Or at least, it was there this morning when I logged my breakfast...

Sorry, my Poe’s Law meter is jacked up now, there have been so many earnest idiots posting everywhere the last few months.

You need to overstep the moderator. Before they do that, say “This is really important. I think we need more time to discuss it.” Then proceed with what you have to say. It makes you look engaged and involved, gets your point in, and lets the others save a little face...

Have you tried “ John, I can see why your wife left you if you can’t shut up for five minutes. Now, back to the topic at hand...”

I have a couple co-workers . . . that take . . . . . long . . . pauses . . . . . . . while talking.

Bull

It’s anecdotal for sure, but in my experience, “once a cheater, always a cheater” is almost 100% true.

I have it on good authority that most people in New York hate New York but they don’t want to admit it to themselves...

Maybe. My sarcasm meter has been pegged for several months now, so it’s hard to tell the difference between sarcasm and stupid. Sadly, assuming stupid instead of sarcasm lately has been a pretty safe bet.

No. He dropped into an article about baking doggie treats to bitch about others being animal lovers when he’s allergic to them. Fuck his whiney bullshit.

That’s a lot of words to say “I’m a dick at work”.

You can say that again!