I will rescind all my previous criticism of Jesse Jackson if he wears a mullet to the Grammys. Also, a wife-beater and a Confederate flag belt buckle.

Apologiiiiize.

Jackson's just pissed he wasn't nominated for a Hymie. Your last album sucked, dude, get over it!

What they really need is a wacky, animated prolapsed uterus that bickers with his wife, like in the Mucinex commercials.

The reactions on Literally Unbelievable are about 55/45, conservatives/liberals.  Although I'm willing to bet most of those conservatives are Ron Paul-supporting libertarians who think 9/11 was planned by the Jews.

Just wait 'til you die. Then they're going to write your life a snarky review.

Would you ask Tom Petty that?

Did somebody say, "Long-lost triplets"?

Oh hey, a comment.

This is season 23 of The Simpsons. We're already there.

You're TEARING THAT EPISODE APART, LISA!

Horrible episode. I laughed once, during the intro.

"Do you feel these discussions have overshadowed your actual performances?" 
"No. I don’t care. They’re irrelevant."
Daaaaaayum! This girl is stone cold.

Loosey Lawless might work.

It actually is a great show. But not because of anything to do with serious subjects like power, loyalty, and corruption. It's great because it has fucking and decapitations.

Don't joke about How To Avoid Huge Ships. I gave that book to my brother for Christmas, but he never read it. Then last week, he was abducted and assimilated by a Borg Cube. Resistance is futile, but knowledge isn't. Read the book.

Heh, Seven, "morass". Indeed.

If it was Jack Ryan from the Tom Clancy novels, that would be AWESOME.

AWESOME! She's STILL HOT!!!

YES! SpaceQuest is the SHIIIIIT!