Ah, the problem is that I'm including characterization from the books, where he's way more competent and pulling a lot more strings. (I don't think that counts as a spoiler?)

"I like soldiers who don't get unknown."

Big yellow joint
Big yellow joint…

Yes, but when is The Winds of Winter coming out?

R'hllor?

"Pet theory"? It's basically text!

I thought the coal mines were only for children now.

SHUT IT!

Lay-gents of SHIELD

The Associates are Thetans!

Truly, hatred of these commercials is the one thing that can unite us all.

I went to prom in my boyfriend's (extremely shitty) Tercel.

The J.D. Power stuff always makes me laugh — I grew up in a big auto industry town and my dad works at the plant, and one time they threw a family celebration thing because the models they made at said plant won a bunch of J.D. Power awards.

Look, it's best if we just don't ask certain questions.

Lois Lane is pretty great.

I think he specifically asks for paraffin or some other lantern fuel in an earlier episode, so they wouldn't be LED. Unless I misremembered that, which is possible.

Eazy E: The Re-Ghostening

Well, they tried to. That's why we're talking about them in the first place!

Hey, hey, we have our own indefensible line of papers with that name!

What, by Fox for ripping off their bit, or by the inevitable wave of discrimination lawsuits?