Sorry for the absence, I’ve been working on some briefs (I’m an undergarment tailor now until my bar score comes in, I took the bartenders test).

youre an idiot

Boy is he going to be red faced.

Did you type all that, my brother dictates all of his emails and comments to his assistant (ie, secretary, let’s call a spade a spade, but don’t call her that, I think she’s half Dominican)

I forgot you wrote the Bill of Rights, thanks Sam Adams.

Go on a run a couple times a week

So much for the Best Evidence Rule... I guess they could try to do another Rape Test Kit but I’m pretty sure that’s a violation of a little thing we call the Double Jeopardy rule.

the referees are part of the field

Jennifer: Our next question comes from Punters Weekly.

At least now he has a reason to start grinding his axe.

Man, I would have loved to be that guy. (The guy who rode his lawnmower over Greg Howard.)

I don’t go to parties, Jake.

And yet here you are, on the outside, wondering why we’re all laughing.

This should be great!

You know when you go to a party, and someone makes a witty comment, and then some other guy in the same conversation circle just basically repeats the witty comment in a slightly different format as the laughter is dying down, and everyone just stares at the guy? Don’t be that guy.

That was the joke, genius.

Oh Jesus Christ, try to keep up.

Doctor: Like they say, that and a quarter will get you a cup of coffee.

The Lakers said “nah”

That would be a question for the courts, some contracts are considered involuntarily signed (cf, age, intoxication, duress, certain races pre-14th Amendment).