It’s going to take me a long, long time to come around on that front end. I appreciate that they swung for the fences, but, man. Catfish vibes.

VAR ruined the entertainment value of that game only for City. If you are a Tottenham fan (COYS), that moment when the ruling came down and the souls left the bodies of Sterling and Pep was fucking amazing. If you are a neutral, it was also amazing for you, as so many neutral fans and commentators and writers have…

“Soccer has existed for over a century and a half without missed calls spelling the game’s doom.”

If it’s more important for you to have an emotional “moment” than to have a fair outcome, go watch a fucking movie.  

Deadspin: VAR is awful

Yeah, I don’t get this article. They showed the replay on every broadcast and even if you weren’t sure about the rule, you could infer it from the fact that they linger on the freeze-frame right as Bernardo Silva has his toe on the ball. Obviously that’s the crucial point that determines whether Agüero was offsides or…

Away goals is a tie-breaker. Going to PKs is a tie-breaker. How is a tie-breaker that involves actual 11-on-11 soccer stupider than the 1-on-1 gimmick?

“The rules are too hard to understand, so there should just be no rules.”

It’s “VAR made the right call, so despite any other legitimate criticism of the system, this article is like 1000 words longer than it needs to be.”

Agüero was clearly offside when he received the ball, though that would not matter if it were just from Eriksen’s back-pass:

Because the ball hit Silva on its way to Agüero (and it’s likely that it wouldn’t have found its way to the open space in front of the Argentine without the deflection), the VAR decision is objectively correct.

lemme get this straight: one of the problems with VAR is that correct decisions seems confusing to people who don’t know the rules and/or dont have access to the replay

If no one is buying your car, it isn’t desirable and at the right price.

I remember those days, when my wife would get clogged milk ducks.  I’d make some hot compresses, and I’d have to chase the little bastards around the living room, finally pinning them down and trying to hold the warm wash cloths and hot water bottles onto the squirmy, squishy little guys. Then after a few minutes, my…

Even a broken Ronaldo rapes twice a day.

Ronaldo just won’t take “no” for an answer.

rapey, rapey clockwork

It’s fucking amazing to me that spending at least $11 billion to improve commute times is more politically viable that just adding real mass transit to an area desperately in need of it. 

I definitely would’ve missed all those shoehorned puns if you hadn’t italicized them, thanks for that 

I get it, man. Waiting on lab results is a harrowing experience.