I work here, shouldn't I be allowed to give more than one upvote?

There used to be a canon, damn it! Then everything after Beast Machines had to screw it all up.

The one you're talking about is Beast Machines and it was dumb. Beast Wars was its predecessor and it was awesome.

Oh, I'm well aware of the Transformers comics, but I don't consider them canon. It's cartoons or nothing.

There's been so many time jumps or whatever, I can't keep track anymore. Old is old to a young person like me.

Yeah, I mean, I know he's super famous and everybody loves him, that doesn't happen without a good reason. Let's all stay friends!

I'm not saying he's a hack, but I have read his Batman stuff and he LOVES digging up plot points nobody remembers/cares about and then revealing that they're actually very important. Like, say, Damien Wayne. Also, didn't he start the convention held in his honor?

Sounds like someone needs a delicious Chicago-style hot dog. How much relish do you want? A ton?

I could only pick one actual song for the joke, and it lost the coin toss.

What? Who doesn't love…Owen Wilson as a…bodyguard for little kids? Something like that? I won't even look it up, I'll just assume I'm right.

That may be how you perceived it, but I believe I called them "peerless masterpieces."

Yes! I can't stand Bendis' Guardians, and the whole Cancerverse explanation was, like, three issues of "we all punched Thanos, then we escaped, but Thanos came with us and Nova died. Whoops."

Something tells me that's pretty far from the nadir of that particular discourse.

An oval is just a fancy circle. It's all the same shape.

Um…no?

Do you think "Ro Key and Peele's cat" would've been a better headline, then? I could change it…

Nice!

Pedantic lawyerly corrections are the best kind of corrections!

That's what I'm here for!

The fact that they're attached to so many games at E3 this year probably means they're not making another Metal Gear Rising, and that's THE WORST.