Oooh oooh! I have another one! (Actually many but I only have so much free time.) I was in a particular branch of a particular service. The ratio of men to women was like 6,054:2. One night, after hitting a bar and singing "I've got friends in low places" at the top of my lungs, I found myself in a shower with a…

May I claim the name Funky Jamiroquai Hats for my new post-punk, acoustic one-woman band?

I don't say this lightly: "Hacky-sack Guy with Nice Eyes" = Stinky.

The scene: a frat house in LA. The boy: a shirtless bringer of 151 to the punch bowl (he was wearing shoes, so 1 point for me). Me: drunk off my ass without a care in the world with a boyfriend comfortably hundreds of miles away (-3 points for me).

Honk. (That is all.)