I hear ya. I do not know how people get so lucky. I must have the worst taste in men of anyone.

Welp, I’ve never felt more alone or single in my life. Thanks Ted!

Tucker, honey, do you have any idea how much white Americans shit and pee in public? Cause it’s a lot. Especially when drunk.

Just to head this off at the pass; no, it’s still racist if you’re going to come into the comments to say something along the lines of “You know I normally wouldn’t say this, but the Roma really are [insert X stereotype here], and I know that because of [insert Y story about a trip to Europe]”

To be fair, the reason I didn’t watch the new Muppet show was because the commercials made it look like they were all acting out of character...

More Justine fun facts:
She referred to herself as “Juzzy Wuzzy” (her maiden name is/was Rusczyk) whenever she was talking about “woo woo” stuff.

Predictions:

Justine was a dear friend who was horrified about police violence and committed to making the world better in every way. She had just picked out her wedding dress last week and was so excited to show me. She was texting me trying to get me to go to “dance church” with her on sunday morning, but instead I went to a…

Transfolks, I’m so sorry that this is happening to you. You matter. You deserve to live unafraid of others. You deserve to be safe.

She needs to stop insulting Sesame Street, a valuable program that provides factual information to the public.

Yeah… Have you really dissected Jr’s emails? Some very important things can be learned from taking a deep dive into them, that not many people have brought up yet.

Kellyanne - When you say, “Collusion? No. We don’t have that yet,” it implies that we will eventually. You might want to refrain from using “yet” in future bullshit sessions.

Someone should just create an interview bot to fill in for Kellyanne Conway and the not quite a Nazi, but wishes he were guy. Gorka’s could just repeat variations of “Donald Trump is an alpha male. I am an alpha male. Our penises are like locomotives made of gorillas”. It would save everyone a lot of time and energy.

Go watch Eddie Redmaine singing Empty Chairs and tell me again how the live singing was the worst in Les Mis please.

...Will Smith spent about 18 years showing that he’s got a hell of a lot of talent, then figured he could relax and just take whatever jobs he wanted. Dude’s got his life down pat, and I respect the absolute shit out of him for that.

Also, likely unvaccinated, thereby raising the chance that disease outbreaks will occur in the vaccinated.

I’ll bet my right arm they don’t vaccinate their kids.

Totally agree on point three. I’m not a business owner, but as someone who uses reviews to make decisions, it’s rare that a single bad review is going to put me off something. I’m well aware that there are drama queens running around on the internet who either exaggerate their experience or who were part of the…

This is the drama that I’m here for and if the universe could please only offer drama of this caliber and not the horrifying real-shit variety it’s been into lately, then I would be a very satisfied customer of this experience called life. please and thank.

As a mother, I offer my opinon that those crunchy motherfuckers let their dirty footed, bare-assed, obnoxiously personal-space-invading little shits run rampant all over their stupid fucking vegan restaurant. And I am positive the 1yo bent over to pick up a stray tofu-o from the ground sharing her butthole for all to…