Yeah, Pilot Viruet, ya hoser! Who do you think you are, (Former) Prime Minister Stephen Harper?

He was on Conan the other night talking about Bowie, and just said some really simple and heartfelt things. He made a crack about how Bowie never had a misfire, and that he and Conan - while artists - would probably die on the downswing.

SHUT UP DAMN IT

"The Army is doing a study on the effects of eating nothing but MREs for 21 daysright now, in which you have to give blood, urine, and fecal samples, but for the measly $200 they’re offering, you might want to give that a hard pass, no matter how curious you are."

…I've got nothing.

Undateable!

You're thinking of the NBA Wizards, who briefly turned to both science and sorcery in a bid to reach the playoffs in 1997.

Read this as "Dank wizards"

And the Vikings broke my heart 1998 style. Sorry, this has nothing to do with Bob's Burgers, but everything to do with soul-crushing disappointment, which is a constant companion for Minnesota fans.

And the Vikings broke my heart 1998 style. Sorry, this has nothing to do with Bob's Burgers, but everything to do with soul-crushing disappointment, which is a constant companion for Minnesota fans.

"She's in an unmarked grave in the Boston Commons. And you know whose grave is marked? Fucking Jim Morrison. People fly to Europe to see it - and he wrote horrible music."

Great Job: "Internet"!

How hard is it to avoid a pun in that headline?

"Yellow Diamond, when I first started here, I believed in what we were doing; now, I'm not so sure. But there is one thing I know: you're the biggest jag-off I've ever worked for. And I hope the homeworld burns to the ground with you in it, because that is exactly what you deserve, you nickel-and-dime chickenshit…

facial expression from hell

Good ol' Tallahassee Trailer Park.

he's Tumblr the person complete with RANDOM CAPITALIZATION OUT OF NOWHERE AHHHH

Look, I never understood BRAs in highschool, and I'm not about to start now.

I missed the bus when it came to having a proper discussion of The Hateful Eight following Igantiy's excellent review, so I would love to have a second chance here.

"All right, better luck next time!"