Motherfuckers are playing checkers but they imprisoned the black pieces and tried to deport the red pieces

I’m 100% certain that’s what she’s gonna say, probably along with some stuff about Hillary. 

“I am a littttttttttttttle scared the right is going to double down on “he didn’t ACTUALLY SAY that he’s withholding military funds therefore he’s innocent.”

“I didn’t explicitly say I won’t give you aid unless you investigate Joe Biden’s son, so everything is okay”. I’m sure that’s what he’s thinking. I’m also sure that “reasonable” Republicans like Susan Collins will be adopting that logic as well.

Right. He didn’t hand over a sack with a dollar sign on it while shaking hands with Zelensky in front of a jail cell containing Joe and Hunter Biden.

Great ready for the “What law did he break?!!1?” cries.

He thinks he’s innocent because in his mind, he never said “investigate Biden’s son or you’re not getting aid.” This is pretty on brand with Trump; he’s never explicit in what he says, but the people around him know exactly what he means. Then they get to go and do the dirty work for him. So if Guiliani or Barr end up…

They have the non-plausible, but still deployable, deniability that because the phone call didn’t mention the military aid, he didn’t use it as leverage. I suspect that the whistleblower report has the connection via communications of others in the administration that the aid was tied to the Biden ratfucking and…

Chili is great, but if I have to hear some sanctimonious prick try to tell me one more time that they “prefer a white chili with chicken and cilantro” I will fight them. Call that THING whatever you want to call it, but do not call it chili! Chili is red, red like the fires of hell, and should never contain poultry.…

How hard are reusable straws to clean? Drinking anything besides water out of my water bottles (and not rinsing them immediately) eventually will result in some sort of accumulation. I imagine it is also sort of true for straws, and would be hesitant to drink from one of those (esp at a restaurant) without inspecting…

I mean, technically, lesbians would still experience the “inability to become pregnant after a certain period of unprotected sex” so if I had been having unprotected sex with my wife for a year and insurance still refused to cover IVF, I would hope I could sue the shit out of them.

Michigan elected an all-female, democratic ticket in 2018. A democratic woman flipped a Michigan Congressional seat that had been a safe Republican district for decades. 2020 is a very different ball game from 2016: I don’t think being a woman is as big of a liability as you think.

I get what you’re saying, but putting someone on the ballot who can’t coherently speak a sentence is also not the answer, and certainly isn’t going to inspire anyone to leave the house and go vote.

I am currently living with my hyper-conservative parents. It has been an eye opening experience as I now need to suffer through Fox news on the daily (rot in hell, Tucker Carlson.) Certain patterns have become evident to me in the few weeks I’ve watched. Fox news ignores the things that really scare them. They can…

I wish we would shut the fuck up about white working class voters. They’re a lost cause and hell bent on voting against their own self-interest. We’ve had two Democratic Presidents when two consecutive terms without them, yet we’re obsessed with courting those five living Reagan Democrats. Those people will never vote…

It bothers me that this is an article about her, but the picture is of her boyfriend. I clicked into other links, and there are only pictures of Mike Pence or Stephen Miller. Scumbag or no, she is a human woman, and not an invisible presence defined solely by the men in her life.

My teenagers already had their ALICE drills at the start of the school year (Alert, Lockdown, Inform, Counter, Evacuate).

I’m sure this will be just as successful as Nancy Reagan’s “Just Say No” was for Patti.

No, the AR-15, which only exists to kill as many humans as possible in the shortest time, is not illegal. 

One of my fondest dreams is for Melania to dump Donnie for Vlad, in a very public way. He’s way better looking and way, way richer. I would LOVE to see how Dump would react.  Melania better move fast, though, as her stock is dropping.