Being from the central valley of California, this made me laugh way harder than it had any right to.

Of course Snyder’s fixing it — have you seen all the civil servants his AG is rounding up for the show trials? He’s gonna fix ‘em real good!

I know they said it was going to be a bad year for pistachios, but 25¢ per nut is absolutely outrageous.

Born in the USA should have a Guinness record for most misappropriated uses in patriotic displays. Clearly most folks never bothered to listen to the actual lyrics.

Trump’s big economic speech for a few weeks ago in Degroit was that American steel— American steel— AMERICAN STEEL— American steel was going to build new skyscrapers all across this country when he's elected President. And I'm wondering: is he going to commission scores of new skyscraper federal buildings? Do his dumb…

It’s real easy. I turn my tv on, and there’s a football game on. Then the game ends and I turn on something else, or turn the tv off.

The most galling part is that Detroit and its school system have been under the control of emergency managers, who report to the state’s Republican governor, since 2013.

I like to think Andy Breitbart leaving this earth was less a death and more like a product recall.

We’re gonna get new factories, new roads, and new schools. And Ohio is gonna pay for it!

Abraham Lincoln is basically the Republican Party’s collective “Black Friend”. They all get to say, “Oh, I’m not racist, because I know this guy”, and they have the added benefit of not actually having to associate with, y’know... actual black people.

I love how to conservatives all of a city’s problems are due exclusively to municipal government policies. County, state, and federal governments are completely ignored. There wasn’t a lot the city of Detroit could do to stop the decline of the domestic auto manufacturing industry, but to conservatives the mayor is at…

One of my very favorite parts of the piece, though, is when Breitbart throws out a casual mention of Donald Trump’s policy chops:

That’s stupid. Why promise schools and factories? That means studying or work.

“We’re the party of Lincoln! You remember him! He fought a whole big war to free the slaves! So, basically, ignore the last 50 years of actual policy and remember the guy from 150 years ago. Clearly, we care more about civil rights than those dirty Democrats.”

I love that this is the Republican narrative. It’s like…

Reading breitbart is fun, whenever I need an alternative reality fiction story.

“Waiting that long and then attacking the tumor when it’s convenient just shows her cowardice.” - Hope Solo, apocryphal

You see so many negative portrayals of professional athletes in the news, and when its positive its a charity type thing that feels forced. So an article like this in which someone is doing the right thing because their are more important things in their life than their sport of choice is refreshing.

He has his priorities right in my opinion

Belichick would've done it.

Also the one ref is waving his arms that the play is over.