I had the same reaction when I first met Krem in Haven, then again on Storm Coast. I was a little pissed at first because it felt like it was going to be one of those moments like in Assassins Creed IV when the reveal around "Kid" occurs (everyone saw it coming, you were fooling no one Ubisoft!), but then 30 or so…

If you only just got into Skyhold, then you have a lot of talking to do with Iron Bull. It is worth it. His over all character and the people he holds company with are some of the best moments in the game, including the conversations you have about Krem's gender.

Ok so I've only had like two conversations with Krem but this explains SO much. I was awkwardly thinking "Wait, he looks like a guy, but he sounds like a girl with a low voice, but he acts like a guy, but... I'm confused."