Dont. You’ll get it right eventually. It’s gona keep sucking so hard, but nobody is any better or worse off than you. Just keep pushing. Dont let yourself be paralyzed by fear. If you keep trying, you’ll get there one way or another.

I hope you don’t mind gross... This is a crux of gross and my hypochondria and funny. Last week I put on my skinny white jeans and went over to the juice bar feeling all suburban fancy wife like. I mounted my pastel bicycle and ordered something that looked like a pink berry delicious healthy brew. Later, I spent the…

You've described and incredibly manipulative man. I doubt there's any way you can ever get the upper hand in this relationship. He's too practiced at this and way too good at saying just what you want to hear. My advice is to run!

My name is an inkblot test. You won’ believe the number of people who swear I’m benji anal lover. My name does not spell that.

HA. funny teaching stories are the best—kids are so weird. I teach at a summer boarding school / camp thing and this one girl (she was like six or seven) could not be talked out of using the word “immortal” when she meant “hungry.” “Miss so-and-so i’m immortal i need a grilled cheese!”

I’ve been laughing at all this…

The bartender put her/himself in that position. S/he kept filling the guys drinks all night, presumably getting tipped for each round and saw what those guy were doing. The bartender should have shut them and you off way before it got to the blacking out drunk stage, and should have told the guys to bugger off and…

Have you fully internalized that this story has no happy ending for you? Even in the best-case scenario, you get your heart broken. Are you ok with that?

It sounds pretty clear that these people were deliberately trying to screw you over. It’s not your fault. At all. And I know, that it’s like - well I should have been smarter....- that’s what I said to myself all the times I got caught with my guard down or forgot to walk away when I should have or whatever stupid…

Last night when I was putting my kids to bed my 9 year old ran into the kitchen and grabbed a kiwi fruit and started running around shouting ‘I have the KIWI OF POWER!’

For what it’s worth, shame breeds in secrecy, so you might find having shared your story actually helps you. I always find acknowledging the thoughts, feelings I’m having does tend to take some of the intensity out of them. But as someone with social anxiety, I totally get how hard it is to get out there and then have…

This is the real world where we don’t behave in perfect ways or handle situations in some textbook manner. Please don’t feel guilty for doing the best that you were able at that moment. If anything, the bartender and driver would probably be gratified to know that things weren’t even worse and they played a part in…

Use it and pass it along! BTW I love your nom de kinja. It gives me a vivid visual every time I read it.

This is my go-to cheer me up picture. YMMV, but I figure it’s worth a shot

Can I get some love and moral support, Jezzies?

This will sufficiently dox me to several people I know, but I doubt they read Jez and don’t really care that much so.......

I picked up my friend from surgery to get his wisdom teeth out and he was still pretty drugged up. When we got in my car, he looked in the mirror and asked me, “Why the fuck do I have tampons in…

It is so hard to find a good yoga studio. I’m just a beginner, but I really struggle in finding a place that is accepting to beginners and still challenging and that isn’t just a bunch of bitchy women in Lululemon tights snarking on the chubby girl trying to get her yoga on.

You want the advice of an internet…

I bought my very first swimsuit today. It’s a swimdress with a cute bow right between the boobie area. Hides the belly fat and looks cute!

I had a truly awesome week! And I really needed it! I accepted a position at a nursing school to get a second bachelors and just knocked out all that I needed to do! Woo me!!! I’m excited/nervous but it’s what I’ve wanted to do!