Ok, I’ve got a mistake which I’m trying to avoid. I love lip products. Love them. Lipstick, lip gloss, lip balm, lip tar, give me ALL the lippies. But certain ones seem to be causing breakouts around my mouth. Which is gross and makes me beyond self-conscious. Any suggestions for sensitive skin? :/

I was wondering if anyone on Jez would mention this, the review that claims Adams’ cover of Style is infinitely more profound than Tay’s original because he mentions Sonic Youth made my eyes roll out of my head.

ALL THE TIME. Hello dream twin.

You too?? I love a good common nightmare.

Definitely had a dream the other night that Gisele and Tom broke up, and that she gave me her blessing to bang him (by “blessing” I mean she was like “eh, whatever, he’s all yours”). In my waking life I don’t know or care about these people, what is my subconscious trying to tell me?

But even if she and the airline came to an agreement, her coworkers weren't part of that agreement. So I don't blame them honestly.

Please do not let prayer selfies become a thing.

Does not compute.

OMG

I’m sorry, did your vagina not immediately hermetically seal itself when he said Trump would be a good president?

That mustache is just fucking offensive.

Pass the snakes.

Hell yeah. Take me to the motherfucking moon.

You know I just smelled my pinky to ascertain its natural fragrance. Seems more than adequate.

I just hope it's fucking torture for her every single time she has to go back, that it makes all her time outside of jail miserable and filled with dread.

Not enough stars.

If anyone needs me, I'm going to climb up the nearest Tag Heuer billboard and take some time to mourn.

After touring Yale when I was in high school, my dad suggested we check the bathrooms to see if the toilet paper was actually just $20 bills. It's obscene how much money they have.

Probably somewhere on Elite Daily.

Oh my fucking god, if I am part of “Generation Tinder,” just kill me RIGHT NOW.