I'd make #3 be "Stop being shitheads to new and casual fans, as well as people that just don't like soccer."

Mike and Kyle Shanahan will get fired.

I blame the fat mouth-breather in the Yankee tank top. Not really; I just wanted to point out that every Yankee fan is a fat mouth-breather in a tank top.

Asstime Car Wash: For Those Perilous Trips Down The Old Dirt Road

"Hey dude - ya better step off"

I'd like to cite the Minneapolis Lakers precedent of 1960.

I know this is crazy, but this beautifully crafted homage to NBA history only makes me think (again) about how absolutely ridiculous it is that the franchise in Utah is named the Jazz. BIGO, Full Disclosure - I am o.k. with Pluralism, but do not practice it because my wife just thinks I want a #2 because there…

like, say, the fact that the Nets' owner was arrested in connection with a prostitution ring and has faced multiple corruption allegations, or that the Cavs' owner was a major player in the subprime mortgage scandal, or that the Magic's owner is a bigot who got rich off a pyramid scheme.

Can he take Stephen A Smith and Stephen B Smith with him?

It's the basketball equivalent of pulling the goalie, only without Shawn Kemp having another kid.

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

As a final "fuck you" to the NBA, Sterling plans on dying tomorrow.

Look, birds have to nudge their young out of the nest, right? This is pretty much just like that, except I've never had the urge to swing a lead pipe into a bird's nuts as hard as fucking possible.

If only we had some leads! GAH!

"Man, cross checking meant something totally different back in my day."

While I love the intent, the athletes-as-slaves metaphor is grossly ignorant at best and outright offensive at worst.

It's the Redskins - what could go wrong?

And, since it only took two years, far faster than most of Weeden's other releases.

As an Ohioan, I'd rather be known for nothing than Cincinnati chili. Starving people in Chad would say that it's shit.

"Fuck the Browns."