This is exactly why we always schedule our vacation trips for the end of February. It gives us something to look forward to during the Big Dark and gets us out of town just when we’re ready to lose our minds. On Feb. 22 you will find me on a beach in Maui, probably Ulua Beach. Stop by and say “Hi”.

I had one at age 25, likely due to my surgeon not taking me off hormonal birth control before surgery. Yeah, periods were a horror movie during that time...

Lindy good, me bad

A $1000 COOKIE UNVEILING in the BASEMENT OF A COMFORT INN in fucking SYOSSET. This is peak Long Island faux-riche trashery.

To be fair, asking “Why would anyone choose to be a conservative?” is a VERY good question. 

A colleague died at our holiday party. Major coronary on the dance floor. 

My husband works for a company that’s incredibly conservative. I generally hate his holiday party because I feel like it’s impossible to have fun, I always have to monitor what I say so I don’t let my evil atheist liberal views slip. ANYWAYS, about 15 years ago when the company was still relatively small, they invited…

I always scroll past the tweets. I always hated the sound of trumps voice, but now I can’t even read his repulsive words. The man is toxic.

1st mission to study its deep interior

Thanksgiving has always been the best holiday for me, Mom and Dad. Even though it was just the three of us, Mom would insist on making a 23-25 lb turkey (they REALLY like leftovers).

THANK YOU. Baked By Melissa is the worst.

I will do the first thing you suggested, thanks! I have too many inexplicably strong feelings about Baked by Melissa (JUST GIVE ME A FULL-SIZE CUPCAKE, etc) after two consecutive workplaces that celebrated every coworkers’ birthday with a box of ‘em.

Fuck her shitty ass parents. Bill for family vacation... I hope she never pays and it fucks up your credit forever, you trifling, nasty assholes. I hope Discover calls you nightly. I hope this article gets you hate mail.

My mom also did this.  My nipple was, at that time, doing that extremely dark and really huge hormonal reaction thing, and as such was a stark contrast to my adorable newborn's head.  She then texted it to everyone and showed her entire office, which included a dude I had fucked who, bless him, did not respond with…

Her constituents did that already.

:Raises hand:

Any other former grad students sitting on what feels like a land mine of revelations about the sexual misconduct of very respected senior professors? I know some stuff that would get prominent people fired. The real question is when to come forward. It’s a huge personal and professional risk.  I admire the women…

Am I the only one who remembers RHODC? I liked that one a lot. One season only.

Point of order: Isn’t the plural technically Cardis B? 

“ But what if it’s her giant diary where she writes all of her thoughts at the end of the day? “