Someday, I’ll get sick of this feature. Today is not that day.

Anybody want to watch the Cardinals lose the World Series?

“I had a parrot. The parrot talked, but it did not say ‘I’m hungry,’ so it died.” - Mitch Hedberg

When I ask the brothers what they would collect if they were as wealthy as the Cowboys’ owner, they respond at the same time and without skipping a beat: “People.”

“Worst quarterback in the NFL,” [Michael] says.

“I bought a seven dollar pen because I’m always losing pens and I’m sick of not caring.” - Mitch Hedberg

I think that’s a fair counter, but mercenary is probably a bit too far. Of a 22 year career, he’s spent 11 years of it in NY. I think the Yankees organization places a premium on “treating players right”, (With the notable exception of Bernie Williams, still mad about that) and even if you don’t buy that, I refer to…

As far as hot takes go, that one was pretty mild. I think you were just looking for an excuse to use that gif

“Fuck-Rod.”

Yes, I’m not sure what the shaming surrounding people utilizing social programs designed to level the playing field/provide needed support is. Can’t bootstrap if you have no shoes.

WHOA LOOK AT THAT HOT TAKE EVERBODY!

Even if he was an affirmative action admission all it would prove is that affirmative action kicks ass and is worth the investment, because we got Barack Freaking Obama out of it.

I swipe only the best.

Technically yes. Just because a few NIMBYs show up at a county council meeting doesn’t mean everyone in the area feels that way. Letting it go to vote and letting the residents decide whether or not to fuck themselves over is the democratic thing to do. It’s also dumb and bad because you know people will vote for it…

Olympic fever. Catch it!

I don’t have much sympathy for a 50+ y.o. bro who feels the need to yell so much at a baseball game that he actually gets the attention of an umpire, Bob Davidson or not.

am the only one giggling at an accreditation body whose acronym sounds like “sacks-cock”?

He is the somewhat slow lovechild of the Brienne/Tormund relationship we were all shipping.

NCAA is a fundamentally racist and oppressive organization that has no place in the 20th century.