“I swear you’ll never see anything like this ever again!” When Martin Tyler, who IIRC has been doing the World Cup every year since 1974, gets that excited you know it’s a big deal.

Chile beating Mexico 7-0.

If I were tech-savvy like all you whippersnappers, I’d add a gif of Homer Simpson (from an early episode) after Bart falls down a well and is rescued: he pounds a stake into the ground with the sign “DANGER: WELL.”

soccer all day tomorrow? Why the fuck not?

Romania missed an easy one and a tough-for-me-but-shouldn’t-be-tough-for-an-international one (where Evra kept everybody on and the Romanian chested it down but hit it too early).

This has to be the winner. I’m laughing just thinking of the NFL’s clarification tweet.

“I deeply regret if I have ever, at any time, said anything, to anyone, that may have caused any offense, about anything, to anyone.”

But did you ask her sister, Wednesday Solder?

The rest of the country doesn’t understand the difference between “Republican” and “Massachusetts Republican.” I voted for Weld too, and I also voted for - gasp! - Romney in 2012 because (a) I didn’t think Obama had done a particularly good job, and (b) I knew Romney wouldn’t do a quarter of the shit he promised. He…