“That’s not so bad.”

Selfish Act Not Self-ish

You’re new here, huh?

Analog dick pics! OMG

I always thought the value of Mike Carey was to show how meaningless and arbitrary the review decisions are.

I tried playing DFS for hockey on one of the sites, but it would only let me Draft Kings. This seems shady, right?

“2 outs, bottom of the 9th in young Scotty’s life”

they had all of recorded human history up until about 2003 to get good at it.

Most surprising part of the headline.

Original group name: Waifus Without Borders

The last time I’ve seen Patriots with a line that weak was when that goddamn skinflint William F Buckley Jr shared a line of what was more or less baby powder with Hammerin’ Henry Kissinger in the men’s room at Studio 54.

Awarded the Dennis Miller Honorary Doctorate for Arcane Commentary, 2016.

He must really suck.

Calm down there, Satan.

I’m still getting reply-alls from the CBS NCAA Deadspin tourney. This was a week ago.

Greater DC Metro Area Strong!!! You know...because of the DC sniper incidents? Hey man, I had to lay down in my car while pumping gas for those couple of weeks! Difficult times, I tell ya!

Also can I say fuck “Boston Strong” too? Being in Worcester when a bomb went off and killed some people you have no relation to does not make you stronger. You’re still a douchebag.

This is actually called the Quebecois Handshake.

This is Adequate Man, not I Spent $500 On Snow Tires And Probably Also Didn't Use Underwear As A Washcloth This Morning Man.