We all know the proper pronunciation of "Audi" is "Outie".

Want to make sure your little darlings know the value of persistence and determination? Not a problem:

In the mid 2000's I found a place in DC that had "I <3 Allah" bumper stickers and bought a handful of them. Upon returning home to San Antonio I would affix one to the bumper of any assholeishly parked big pickup.

If only those greedy bastards at UHaul would provide some instructions, where they could be clearly seen by any sentient being whose butt is in the driver's seat of the vehicle towing that trailer. Maybe a warning of some type or a speed limit; instead they only post this hieroglyphic which no living human could ever…

and your zoo doesn't let ya pet 'em, either...

All of Route66 through NM qualifies as a good place to stop for lunch. You can't go wrong with a green chile cheeseburger anywhere in the state.

Dang straight! Braum's only extends to just South of Dallas on I35 so I am damned to live a Hot Fudge Brownie Sundae free life unless I'm headed North for several hours. My wife and I went to a show at the American Airlines Center and we hit Braum's for lunch and a Double Dip Sugar-Shock Express in both directions. …

Don't tell that to the Utahraptor:

I live in San Antonio and drive a Miata. I don't have to assume every other driver is a dumbass; I am given proof that every time I hit the road...

What we can extrapolate about the design from every frakkin' pickup produced in the States for the last 15yrs:
It will have a load-over bed height of 6'7" and the bumpers will be vertically centered on the giant belt-buckle worn by the male model portraying a cowboy in the first series of "Truck Yeah" commercials for…

I solved this issue by dating the HR woman who initially interviewed me for the job.

It was a 6yr old minivan, so that would make it retroactively Italian?

Actually, all the Rudy's have Gas Stations and quickie-marts attached. The original Rudy's, in Leon Springs, was that way so all of them are.

Stuckey's!
Because: Pecan Log.

That place is vile. It's bad enough that they can't make a decent burger or fries, but how in hell do you manage to screw up a shake?

yeah, I knew the QoD was going to belong to the Beaver Cult today...

Braking Bad?

So: Breaking Probe?

Colorado Springs is the Florida of Colorado. If there's a wacky gun-crime, bizarre psycho-chick or insane auto-motive mishap in the Front Range odds are it's in the Springs...

How do you fit 2months worth of Spam into your gun?