Anyone who’s ever been a in a gym locker room is familiar with Old Man Balls. It has to be an inside joke among retirees or something. Why else would someone decide it was a good idea to sit spread-eagle on a bench with his nuts hanging halfway to the floor? It’s deliberate, and has was I assume is the intended effect.

Like Wesley Snipes’ accountant, I have nothing. As a man of the Negro persuasion, I take my showers at home, because YT men always wanna hold naked conversations and get dressed from the top down. All I see out of the corner of my eye is a polo, angora socks, and what I wish was a pink satchel. I have neither the time…

Especially the piss bomb...when uncircumcised dudes would pinch their foreskin and piss into it, then splash it on an unsuspecting scout team scrub.

My girl, for real. How you gonna come after sauce after you do that travesty to fried chicken?