“Ram” and “Chaos and Creation in the Backyard” are two of Paul’s most underrated, fantastic albums.

And despite your corporate overlords telling you to stick to sports, I hope Deadspin never does because

and I can’t emphasize this enough

I come to Deadspin BECAUSE YOU DON’T JUST STICK TO SPORTS

Head-scratching Homer?

Yeah? Well, the jerked store called; they're running out of you! 

I also share similarities with your dad. For example, last night we both porked your mom!!!

Given today’s news, I wanted to voice my appreciation for this post that is decidedly not about sports.

I remember watching Charlie Hough "plunk" a batter with his 46mph knuckleball. The batter laughed at him and pretended to charge the mound. Ahhh, good times.

The Jags have decent talent on both sides of the ball.  What they lack is someone even remotely resembling an NFL Quarterback.  Too bad there are no decent QB’s out there who have demonstrated they can take a defensively-minded team to the SuperBowl.  #TakesAKnee

“Is it Scarpiello or Scallopini? Which is it? Monz, I want the one with the sausage. Wait a second. Monz, remember we went to that place? Remember the pasta with the sausage? Was that Scarpiello? In Astoria. It was bolognese? It wasn’t sausage? Ok. I’ll have the fish.”

i do not like dem apples.

This is some weak ass bullshit. The Democrats had no power. We’ve known since Kennedy retired that this was a losing battle, but it was a battle that the Democrats had to fight. They mounted as effective a campaign against Kavanaugh as could be made, and they lost, which was absolutely to be expected. This loss was…

“Maybe they’re at the...library?” — U of A professor, before putting a gun in mouth

You should let FIFA know so they can update their rule book. Sorry...so they can update the “Laws of the Game.” Don’t want to come across as a stupid American who doesn’t know proper terminology.

Buffalo “buffalo” buffalo buffalo.

SWEET SWEET BEAUTIFUL JUSTICE!

“And if I should overstay my welcome, just tap me on the head.”

MINE ENDS IN TEARS AS WELL

I hope he hits five home runs and each one features an increasingly offensive bat flip.