Well the main Deschutes brewery is in Bend, but I’m assuming you mean the local brew pub here. You should come up and do Zwickelmania next year - all the local breweries open their doors for tours and there’s a bus you can take. Pretty cool. I also highly recommend going down the Gorge to Hood River - Full Sail is out…

I just can’t imagine picking up a Bud when there’s Deschutes Mirror Pond or Session. Do you not wish to enjoy what you’re drinking? Bud and Coors and all of the rest of them are just bloat factories with no flavor. I drink one or two of those and I’m burping and unhappy. I drink one or two Mirror Ponds or a few…

Squeezing a dead skunk into a pint glass would be more refreshing than a Corona Extra with a lime wedge. Go for a Dos Equis at least.

1) Don’t live there.

I want no dissension...just dynamic tension...

The first episode will be streaming for free! We’ll even have it here on Jalopnik. After that, you deadbeats have to pay, but with any luck it will be on a streaming network once the season wraps.

I really enjoyed and still miss driving my Pontiac Solstice.

We had a 2006 Hyundai Tucson for a few years. It was fine. It got us places. We could put stuff in the back. It was very, very gray. It was handy when there was ice because it was AWD.

An anarcho-libertarian smug fest where smug anarcho-libertarians go to live in a hot desert for a week to prove how self-reliant they can be. Also there’s “art” and they burn a big thing at the end. Tickets are billions of dollars and that gets you...access to a desert. You have to bring literally everything else…

Ew. What? Ew. What? Ew. What? Ew.

So that sounded like karaoke.

Also, don’t drive stoned.

No.

Loved when Rick bitched out the spa worker for having a “juicy voice.” That’s a pet peeve of mine. Clear your damned throats, people!

If you’re not willing to wear a helmet while operating a car/truck/tractor/bicycle/horse/racing snail/etc. then you really have no business nannying a motorcyclist who chooses to let the wind flow through their hair.

An army of Datas?? With two androids, you had a good one and an evil one. You’d end up with half your army going evil!

It’s that pesky e=mc^2 problem

Get at least a 250 if you’re taking a highway regularly.