Here’s the true answer: Every single Toad that puts on the specific princess crown can and will turn into Peach. Why do you think there’s a Toad at the end of every castle in the NES Mario? The crown is passed around as a means to manipulate Mario into “liberating” castles all over the mushroom kingdom. When the Toad…

The Internet was a mistake.

Ha! When I was a kid, a friend at school had already finished Metroid before me and he said that if you beat it fast enough, he takes off his suit to reveal he’s a dude with really big chest muscles. Denial is a powerful thing.

I tend not to comment on women’s appearances but... do conservatives just have a little tree that cruel-looking blond women bud from?

I tend not to comment on women’s appearances but... do conservatives just have a little tree that cruel-looking blond women bud from?

I get what you say, the risk here is for people not being able to buy upfront, those people obviously aren’t in a secure financial position. And 35$ a month could become a lot of money very quickly.

I played Metroid when it first came out. I was 12 at the time. TBH, I never needed a map because half of the fun was in the exploration. I’d eventually memorize power up locations and enemy patterns. This is just how gamers did it.

The later addition of annotated maps was nice, but felt contrary to purpose. I…

Somebody doesn’t understand the point of the game. You were SUPPOSED to get lost. You weren’t supposed to get all of the power ups either. Did you notice how, when following a walkthrough the game is easy as hell? Yeah it’s not supposed to be easy. You are supposed to spend hours going over every corridor making your…

How did the original players cope with not having a map for their games?

I just remember those horrible codes you had to write down to save your game.  As a little kid I remember spending more time on that stupid screen inputting the code from my sloppy little kid handwriting.  Is it a 1 or an l is it a zero or an “O”.  When was the last time you rage quit over a save screen.

Except that when you read a note placed by some random stranger somewhere in the world that refers to something in the game and not to you at all, it’s not even close to the same thing as someone calling you a name.

Also, what kind of attitude is that to have to your audience? Comes across as “I’m right, and if you disagree with me, you’re a dick”. Implying that anyone who disagrees with your article is a “toxic gamer” is a little much, isn’t it?

Amazing Chest Ahead was kinda funny because you didn’t really expect it (at least I didn’t back when I first played DS). However, when every fucking message is “try finger but hole” or some other juvenile stupid joke it gets really annoying really fast.

Up next, “People are spelling ASS and TIT on high score boards in arcade games! OUTRAGE.”

“Who gives a shit?” is currently the most-liked comment on an article that not only expressly defines who, in fact, gives a shit, but also why they do. Way to go, dummies.

Yet another “why is this even an article on Kotaku?” moment.

I don’t post notes like this in Soulsborne games, nor do I find them funny... however, getting tilted enough to make a 2 page dissertation on the matter is fucking ludicrous. Go outside. Lighten up. Do literally anything else with your life.

Who gives a shit? This is like saying “Blocks are great except kids spell BOOBS”.