He’s a moron, but he spent most of his adult life being hit in the head for money.

He’s in a Whole Foods.

Produce is fucking expensive these days!

Damn it. +1

I knew there was a reason Chip Kelly kept him around.

Let’s just lay it all out. Unless you were born under the correct sign, with the exact right amount of pigmentation, in the correct country, in the correct state, to the correct color parents, had the correct friends for the proper length of time, contribute to the “good” political party etc(x10000 etc^2)... your…

Can’t

This should be the next legal defense for a civilian facing a murder charge. “Your honor, it was a very emotional experience for me. I don’t believe I am capable of performing such an act again.”

“NOT GUILTY!”

He originally said a bazillion but he forgot to carry the 1.

Maybe more of those good cops should shut down the bad ones instead of looking the other way. Seems like this whole thing would be over in ten minutes if the numbers are like you say.

El Paso school takes an El Paso

“I don’t want to speak your language”

And which organization should he donate to for that?

Only those dead black people should have a voice...

So you can’t criticize unless you are actively being oppressed at the moment, can’t look out for others if you have succeeded and if you are being “oppressed” then shouldn’t you be looking for a job instead of whining. It is almost as if...

Dear Lilly King;

I would have assumed this story was a lie until the part where you admit that your music was a mix of incubus and dave matthews. No one would make that up about themselves. Consider yourself believed.

Michael: “People love J.J. Watt, but they don’t really like J.J. Watt, know what I’m saying?”

which features Martellus saying that “NFL” stands for “Niggers For Lease”

Interesting choice - I wouldn’t want it on me. I would just give him the dollar and walk away.