While I like where you went with this, Shelob was just a predatory creature whose lair happened to be in the way. She wasn’t inherently evil.

“How dare you sit there and blame white people for the problems of the minority communities. After all, aren’t you half white? Didn’t two white parents adopt you, after yours weren’t willing to raise you?!”

I, for one, will definitely never buy Krush, Club Sport Live Healthy or Australian Tan products now that this has come to light...

Transwoman here trying to get in early before there are too many comments on it.

Not surprising that the most important interview to ever air on Colin Cowherd’s show happened on his day off.

Bears picking their own apples.

I... Don’t want to make jokes about this...

Mike Missanelli: “The only thing I can tell you is that Dwayne from Swedesboro showed up live here at the radio station.”

My dad is from Richmond, VA, and has been a lifelong, die-hard Skins fan since the days of Sonny Jurgensen. He has also been a Civil War re-enactor for over 20 years, re-enacting in the unit from Robert E. Lee’s army where we had eight ancestors killed in action during the Battle of Gettysburg. He’s not the most…

I’m beginning to wonder if the foundation of Bolt’s incredible speed came from a few thousand attempts to run away from home.

Categorically untrue.

Don't think gawker media needs another lawsuit on their hands. Retract this.

The Dutch fans are wonderful, both in general and for spectators. Soccer, cycling, speed skating events, you’ll see a whole host of tall-ass, pale, wonderful orange-clad fans.

* Exception: Feyenoord fans. They suck.

**I may or may not be an Ajax supporter.

It stopped?

Meanwhile, in Mom-land:

Chill Winston...

You guys really just can't let other people have fun, can you?

More like stinkpiece amirite

Then go somewhere else where you’ll be happy. It’s obviousy not here.

Love this one, too. De Grasse all “I know, I know, but I had to try..."