One word: BADGE

Aaah! The pinball wizard, I thought they were gonna escape!

100% guarantee that is dip spit.

They wanted to have a pipe spool erected!? That's inappropriate. You can't say that.

Play it again, Roger.

Love,

Just get back up.

Is he wearing eye liner?

It's like he doesn't ask permission before he just goes ahead and does stuff.

This isn't even my favorite Smashing Pumpkins song but Ieeeeeeeeeeeee don't even care.

Oh, god... I'm bracing myself for the AP jokes we're gonna hear after the first half the Vikings just had.

Doesn't matter how spell. That's not how you grammer.

Who the fuck is Jackie Robertson?

Wow, that's amazing just like... This new company where I'm making $6500/month from home!!! You can too! thisisnotascam dot com

Goochland? Sounds about right.

Fun fact: Chicago is called The Second City because it was rebuilt after the Chicago fire, not because it won the silver medal of municipalities.

Strawberry!? Are you fucking kidding me!? This list is practically a gore .gif.

No matter how much you shake and dance, the last two drops get in the pants.

Men's swimsuit liners suck, so I buy suits w/o liners. But, I wear underwear because I'm not gonna let my privates touch the shorts like a goddamn heathen.

How can you tell someone went to Notre Dame? They'll tell you.