Indoctrination can’t possibly begin too early. 

I was concerned it’s some NAMBLA thing.

Don’t worry, it’s just “bomb stuff”

You make that joke, but I’m already disgusted to see some of my “friends” on Facebook sincerely posting words to this effect. I don’t know what to do. It seems pointless to engage them. 

Best thing I’ve seen on twitter:

woof.

That van is insane! If you were that guy, wouldn’t you have borrowed a ... less conspicuous car from a friend?

He shows up in the nick of time to steal your dog, leaving only his calling card: a cigarette burn on your toilet seat.

the jackass likely summers in Texas and winters in Florida ... to live like a true derpshit

Get outta here with that, the bugs GIF is gold!

Our thoughts and prayers need to go to the victims here. We shouldn’t rush to make laws at this time. We can’t use this crisis to write legislation to single out law-abiding citizens. The guy was just a normal neighbor, no one would have thought he could have done it. It’s just an isolated incident, we can’t use it to…

Oh, Florida Man!

Worst superhero ever.

Of course it is Florida, of course.

Honestly, I thought there’s no way it could be THAT OBVIOUS. I don’t know why I’m expecting subtlety and complexity still in 2018. The correct answer is the dumbest most blatant answer. 

We all knew it was gonna be Florida, right?

Ohhhh crap, it was Florida Man all along???

Sounds like you’ll be having quite a festive Thanksgiving. 

...You can’t regulate evil...