No way Trump dodges a shoe. He doesn’t have the reflexes. Jabba the Hut has a better chance of dodging a shoe. Trump is a sitting duck for a Florsheim Facial.

I hate when people say grace while holding hands. It’s so presumptuous and there’s really no way to not participate without drawing attention. If you invited me over to eat, don’t make me pray with you or feel guilty for not wanting to. Also, germ transmission.

“SQUIRTED MIXTURE OF BLEACH AND WATER INTO RECTUM WANTING TO PREVENT AIDS”

Why is Kinja Caffeine Spider “unable to click through and read articles that it links to”?

What was “The Kinja Caffeine Spider” doing “victim blaming in the AV Club comments”?

Trump- “hold my Adderall” Ok, to be fair it could be worse, but the year’s not over yet.

We get it!

Love that the one staff-approved comment on this article so far is bitching about “liberal trolls.”

It was among the Best Fiction of 2018!

I would nominate “The Great Splinter Commenter Purge” wherein the staff explained their reasoning for why they chose to throw all the commenter recommendations into the garbage and their commitment to, let me find the right wording here,

You can be black and LGBTQ. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

Trump decided to hitch his star to the performance of the stock market, most likely in the face of all advice not to do so because of this.  So, like most of his shitty half-baked ideas, he’s going to have to own this one.

It’s hilarious that the dotard, upon presumably having somebody read the letter to him, was too stupid to realize it was an insult. He made that tweet about Mattis retiring with honors, then started dumping on him two days later after Fox and Friends explained the letter to him.

Here’s the list of top Ingraham advertisers for the third quarter of 2018, just in case you want to avoid them like the plague.

Legend levels would be if Mexico built a wall on their side of the boarder and suckered Dotard into paying for it.

Hope you get your money back.

I guess people didn’t read it as a joke, because anytime you can burn Black MAGA is a good time as far as I’m concerned.

These days I wonder how many Mexicans are donating, to keep us contained. I wouldn’t blame them.

Yup!