That shit is hilarious.

I agree. However, for all we know, that did take place here and the surrogate chose not to abort anyway.

I feel like in general, if you become a surrogate it is best to be prepared to honour the parents' wishes should they want to abort due to a catastrophic birth defect.

*shrugs* He doesn't want to change his diet and I can't force him to. I have accepted the fact that he'll probably die sooner rather than later. At least he has good life insurance. :/

UGH! I made a conscious decision to fart in front of my boyfriend right when he moved in with me, even though the thought was mortifying. It was very silly, but I felt like unless I did it right away, I'd be uncomfortable in my own home forever. Thank god I did. He has since said, "there's no way I'm living with a…

I would probably shit my pants if I see him again. Then I'd throw the poop stained pants at him and waddle-run away. I moved halfway across the country and changed my name to be rid of him. He didn't take too kindly to me breaking up with him due to his wandering dick.

Ladies, if he won't "allow" you to fart or burp…

Everybody loves a happy ending.

That's true, some girls are so fucking insane that you can't break up with them without causing a massive scene, or death.

A friend of mine got told on the Fourth of July that her husband wanted a divorce. He blamed her for everything - she was too in to her career, she wasn't getting pregnant fast enough, and a bunch of other douche canoe things in a list that smelled, shall we say, fishy, from the beginning.

He insisted I was never allowed to fart or burp in his presence.

This is a story about how I didn't catch a cheater until it was way, way too late, and also short parable about checking all your Facebook inboxes on a regular basis.

If you didn't know, Facebook has two inboxes. The normal inbox where mail from your friends go, and a second, "other" inbox where mail from people you…

I SWEAR that was accidental.

"Wow, I forgot how big you were."...? What kind of fucking douchebag thing is that to say to someone you're about to have sex with?

walked into a party with my girl on the side. not 10 minutes later, my gf (and 1st love) walks in...with her guy on the side. my gf winked, i smiled.

I ain't trying to judge, but that shit is ALSO cold-fucking-blooded. Who are you people? I need a shower.

is how that made me feel.

I ain't trying to judge, but that shit is cold-fucking-blooded.

Doesn't anybody ever just say, "hello dear, I'm having some doubts about our relationship, can we talk about this"? Anymore? No? Just jump straight to the retaliation-cheating, huh?

So.

Oh yeah, Shitbag's real name was Scott. On the (very) off chance that you know him and connect the dots from this story, you should judge him and revile his friendship. <3