For those of you in the "TL; DR" category:

If we as a society would just finally legalize prostitution, then murdering sex workers would be regulated and taxed, and sex clients wouldn't have to murder sex workers in secret any more.

How do you know this?

Yeah OR she was yet another craigslist hooker and he was yet another craigslist hooker killer.

No doubt the Jills were exploited and underpaid, but most of this is sound advice for people whose job is to serve as PR/goodwill ambassadors and sexual eye candy for the team. Not only that, but rules like these tend to be born of adverse experiences, not unlike the "For external use only" warnings on shampoo…

Why would anyone want to have sex with Ray Romano? Except for money?

Yay. Using your children for your own novel social experimentation. Yayyyy.

This plane crash was obviously a FALSE FLAG!!!!!!!

He needs to do what I have done.

Might be all the rapeyness. And the poo-covered babies dropping out of a guy's rectum where, most non-sicko people would agree, no babies belong.

Heavy misogyny and male homosexuality? No way! Gay men on TV are just like other women, only cattier.

I was hoping for the inevitable yet utterly laughable accusation — although it is veiled — of homophobia that this article would provoke. I thank you, sir/ma'am/whatever gender paradigm you identify with right now.

I'm sorry, but from now on the word "Drake" will always be synonymous with "groupie analingus."

Not impressed.

She just wanted to have a wholesome bachelorette party with balloons and cake, for free, and this guy made it all about immature superficial stuff like looks. Next thing you know, they'll post someone at the door to only let in young people who look and dress a certain way.

Yet 35,000 Greeks are still drawing paychecks from this airport.

He might have more bath towels than Babe Ruth had, too. Statements of facts without meaning, implied or otherwise, are mere trivia.

THIS.

It's called fair use and parody. Case dismissed.