*counting on fingers*

I’m gonna say, thirty... nine?? ... yeah. Thirty nine minutes better.

Fruit Stripe is the Hydrox of shitty fruit flavored gum.

Oh crap

What do you mean "imagine"? Some of us do have to appear at press conferences after days at the office that didn’t go well. One time a couple years ago we had a run of days like that, but we faced our grim task as best we could and took our licks on the media circuit. Then one day the big boss (as in the boss’s boss’s…

Damn.  More howlers than a Costa Rican rain forest.

Man, Venus Williams is the best.

(bees swarm the comments section)

It would have been great if Montreal had mixed up their Sebastian Ahos.

Just going to leave this here:

Ah yes, the country that declares the Men’s World Cup trophy (created by a Frenchman and awarded by an organization based in Switzerland) is “coming home” anytime they string a couple of victories together is schooling us on arrogance. Got it.

(sound of crickets)

Makes perfect sense to me. People who move to Arizona just to hang out in the casino all day make up 12% of the state’s economy. I’m gonna send him a coin bucket and half a pack of Marlboro 100s to congratulate him on his early retirement.

I never want to hear about the NBA having the greatest fans on Earth when none of them have tried to murder James Dolan.

They got stonewalled... in NYC... during Pride Month. I don’t know that there’s a connection, but here we are, Mr Vice President...

That said, I’m still 90% certain Dolan thinks The Nets still play in Jersey.

“Look, New York is the Mecca of basketball.”

Delicious.

Ya Gotta Bereave!

“The joy I feel is unmatched.”

You wrote all that, but I'd shut the door and closed the curtains one paragraph in.