"How much easier would it be to recruit at Florida if your fan base stopped wearing jorts?"

I'm kind of all in for Guinness, avatar-wise.

Fucking Moncton. Bastards.

The horse and Johnny both have an affinity for Scotch and prefer to be lowered by pulley onto their mates.

I'll start a KSK-style draft of who's drunker than A.J. right now. First pick is Jeff Reed.

They're a piece of cake compared to a Catholic wedding.

Yeah, he's gay. He may not know it or want to admit it, but... She ought to ask him to go to a doctor just to make sure hormonal levels are okay, but that's a real long shot.

Such weary outrage.

My sump pump made headlines(well, in SumpPump! magazine) when I got it. It's indestructible.

For the love of God man, watch those transfats.

I have a terrible rotting flesh smell in my basement. And I can't move my clown outfits to the attic why? Thank you, because of the rotting flesh smell.

The Pogues, woman.

The Dropkick Murphys perimeter is collapsing into an area smaller than Ben Affleck takes credit for.

Free St. Pat's advice to you young fellas:

Enough with the depilatory stories.

Netflix Instant has crossed the threshold - there's a ton of stuff now that you actually want to watch. And!, there's probably a second documentary on Narwhal whales! Probably.

Funny enough, I just told my wife tonight that she had to watch it again - I came across the last hour of it two weeks ago.

Man, your house is going to stink in about 12 hours.

A-ha! Perhaps you could help me program my Betamax?

Dagnabit!, I was going to send that into #tips, but that seems to have disappeared.