One word. Surrogate.

I just stop and let them walk into me. I don’t know why doing this satisfies me so, but it does. I find this less irksome than food delivery guys on their bikes barreling down the sidewalk at me while I’m walking my dog. I am not jumping out of your way, you are going to fucking STOP/move over or we’re going to have…

The correct reply is (1) a big ol’ sneer that lifts your upper lip to your nose, followed by (2) “You oblivious cunt.”