200 years from now, it might look something like this:

Just sayin’.

I’m trying to get over someone *blowing a fucking whistle* to break up a pit fight.

B+ on the bad armchair lawyer grading scale. If you’d gone over the top and invoked RICO you could have gotten an A. Too bad.

Kinda like woeeee, woeeeee, woeeeee, blk, blk, blk, blubbwoeee, woeee, woee,woeee, bgkla, blkg, blka, woooeeee,woeeee, woeeee, wooeeeeeee, blkal, blkal, blummmmpurrr, wooeeeeee.

I would be this guy; then I’d go to my trailer for a beer.

“But I can do this.”

There’s more to this story. Maybe they KNEW each other?

Have you ever spilled a bag Flamin Hot Cheetos on your lap?!

How you hope the night goes

He really wanted a driver.

I’m not gonna lie—I had to make sure the model wasn’t a cake before I went ahead and posted it. It kinda looks like a cake! One of those fancy-cakes with lots of fondant that looks cool and makes great shapes, but that you also wish was just normal icing when you go to eat it.

Not sure how this helps, but ok....

Driver’s seat?

Oh sure. When the dog climbs into an open cop car it’s cute and understandable. But when I do it I’m “going to jail for sure” and “a sick son-of-a-bitch and need to put my pants back on”.

AND HE’S A GOOD BOY! YES HE IS!

I got here as soon as I could

Well, Jackie Stewart just called Hamilton a “little ballerina”, after his antics in Abu Dhabi.

Oh, and before anyone bitches about the vertical-oriented video, just remember, this guy was getting charged by a hippo, not re-making Citizen Kane. You’ll live.