I really wish I could but it’s hard enough being a chick in comedy. I will hurt my career.

Fine... I’ll go...

That joke was in the tweet! get outta heeeeere!

Indeed, I can corroborate that alcohol and maybe drugs are fun. You haven’t lived until you’ve cried yourself to sleep while watching Grey’s Anatomy reruns and despondently clutching a gin and tonic.

I can. I do stand up (not as much as I used to) and know a lot of comedy folks. It’s one of those things everyone finds out at some point. Like how Amy Schumer is rude and Mark Maron will try to fuck you. It’s just a thing you find out if you’re around long enough.

I remember reading on Gawker last year (?) that a commenter said he saw Jimmy Fallon walk into a party and ask if anyone had any coke, and was basically a drunken/high mess. Took that with a grain of salt but the more stories I hear and read (and even my own encounters with celebrities), I think it’s pretty safe to…

When he said doing the 1989 cover album was “an unpretentious thing to do,” that was the most pretentious thing I had ever heard.

I think he just meant that they're both really boring

Ugh, this guy.

I am v excited to go and stand in the lobby while yelling, “IS IT OVER?! OH GOD TELL ME WHAT’S HAPPENING!” with my hands over my eyes.

So, I actually think this is kind of sweet. She has been very open about how miserable and uncomfortable and bad she feels while pregnant. If it were anyone but Kanye, I think we’d see this a lot differently than we are. A husband orchestrating a ridiculous, silly birthday scheme to make his wife feel better? MONSTER.

Wait, Sarah Silverman is dating Wesley Snipes?

Holy shit. Mona-Lisa is Marcel the Shell?! Mind. Blown.

we’re making fun of this because it’s absurd, right? like she’s very dating jonathan rice? right?

I really hope this isn’t true. I can’t stomach another story about some way way older dude banging some real hot young chick again.

1. Blake Lively is aggressively uninteresting.

‘Does drugs for breakfast’ as a written line deserves at least some recognition.

omg I just lost it

Hey Bobby. I think I love lou.