I LOVE YOU KITCHEN GUN

‘tis but a scratch.

I always liked these, wouldn’t own one but they always catch my eye. Like something the Teletubbies would cruise around in.

The mere sight of your ex-popo interior makes me oddly compelled to urinate and/or hide my drugs in the backseat.

I have the FB app on iOS but I have not done messenger, other than an initial prompt window saying “don’t you want the messenger app” to which I click no, the mobile site works just like the app should.

I now bestow thee, thine honour of “COTD.”

I got the notification on my phone that I needed to download FB Messenger to keep reading my messages on mobile, and said, “Guess I won’t be able to read my Facebook messages on mobile!”

I’m trying to picture a slow loris as an angry drunk.

speaking of white people shit...

I bought a can of them the other day. For some reason they were labeled “Vienna Sausages.”

Someone here should definitely go away. I’ll agree with you up to that point.

I’m a mobile developer, and we just finished a project that required real time audio processing and playback on both Android and iOS. It worked well on iOS, but on Android was a nightmare, and never reached acceptable levels of quality.

Wouldn’t it be funny the scientist is painting these spiders just to get some fame for himself.

Trump will start building shitty hotels for ISIS that will subsequently go bankrupt and then fall apart because they were so shoddily built.

yeah wtf. I don’t WANT TO GO TO CHURCH

If we get Trump, ISIS will get what’s coming to it.

Yes, more privatization of medicine. That’s gotten us so far now. How do you like those ever increasing insurance premiums and out of pocket maximums? You like sucking the dick of capitalism that much huh?

My Spider-Sense says you’re against Obamacare.

I think once the term “manscaping” entered every day language it became very common for dudes to discuss it. “Do you manscape?” is not a rare question among male friends, especially over a couple beers.