Fear not, I went down the same dark road as you. I love that afterwards it gives you sort of an embarrassed message of encouragement.

if u swim around the ship in dire dire docks 64 times and then collect every star in the game, u unlock peach and shes naked and gives u a lapdance

Fighters Megamix for the Saturn let you fight as a car.

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The Great Mystery of the Roof Pizza

I miss serendipity like that.

We must never forget PEPSIMAN.

His name is actually spelled "Aerith."

Good point. Years after playing FFV, I remember it being one of my favorites, and I just assumed that it was because of the story. But now I can't remember anything about it apart from Ex-Death banishing people to another dimension.

ARGH SPORTSFRIENDS YES

Still need to watch that one. I forgot about that, plus Bedtime Stories, plus all the various shows they do on Jash and the weird Herman Cain albums. They're really keeping busy.

So you're saying it's BETTER than Foodfight?

I'm actually impressed by how active and relevant they're staying. They could've coasted after Tom Goes to the Mayor or Awesome Show. But then they had Check It Out, and now they're producing some really great shows like The Eric Andre Show and Nathan for You. I still get excited every time I see they're working on…

That makes sense. I guess Final Fantasy can still be crazy ("fal'Cies"?) without the structure of the narrative being incoherent.

On the crazypants scale, Zell has nothing on goddamn Necron from Final Fantasy IX. The entire game chasing is spent chasing Garland and Kuja, two decent enough villains. But after defeating Kuja in a final battle, you are teleported to the Hill of Despair (?) where you fight a massive blue, winged muscleman named…

This truly is the worst queso-nario.

That's a really good point about FFVII. The older games were still confusing as hell, but the confusing parts were background color rather than the focus of the story. There was a part of FFVIII where you go to the moon, and for the life of me I can't remember why, but it largely doesn't matter apart from "That's…

And the Gummo Award for Worst Article Picture goes to…

We played four games over the weekend and I can attest that, yes, it is amazing. If you have the right crowd and a good physical setup, it is an unforgettable experience. Heed the advice posted earlier: start on a low difficulty and ramp up from there. I'll make your near-defeats at the end more worthwhile.

Any word on the multiplayer mode? As someone who's really gotten into local co-op games (soon, Sportsfriends, soon), it sounds like a hoot.