See also: Obstructing Government Administration:

I’ve been reading about Sinclair’s “segments” since last year, and I was always under the impression that they’d be pre-packaged segments that the local affiliates would cut away to for a few minutes. While that would still be bullshit, but I would hope that the average viewers would be able to parse out the…

Congratulations, Mr. Stan, Mr. E Vogel, and Mr. HammerheadFistPunch, on COTD! I would like to gift you guys with a Jeep which this lovely lady will deliver as soon as she picks up some toilet paper, a tarp and an work coat.

I’m from the middle of nowhere South. And I can’t help thinking, all this would be solved if people would fucking use birth control and stop having babies when the community is dirt poor and those kids are just going to grow up suffering.

Also ...

she’s probably hoping you like to eating out on vacation as well. just keep that in mind...

How much Skoal? The truck is partially submerged in the stuff.

I’d rather tell you about the time I didn’t get caught.

Ugh, my absolute pet peeve in speeches is when someone spends the opening 30 seconds talking about how brief they’re going to be or how they know they’ve only got a minute or two left.

Even more impressive? The maxillofacial reconstruction surgery he will get when he goes down on the next bad bump and eats 150 feet of angry concrete.

I think you’re onto something there...

“The State of California is known to the State of California to cause cancer.”

If this had happened in the U.K., the headlines would all be about “knicked knickers.”

Just put it in some rice, it’ll be fine...

The biggest surprise about this is that it wasn’t at the Oakland Coliseum.

As with any close friend or family member, I would encourage you to consider these gifts rather than loans. Allow them to pay you back when/if they can, but if they never do, don’t let that get between you. Let them call it a loan if it makes them feel less dependent or hurts their pride less, but tell yourself that…

At least while you’re saddled with a 72 month loan you can’t afford, you’ll have some sweet Kia to drive.

Remember when police officers would come to school as part of the DARE program? This is the kind of CP they warned us about.

Clearly this car delivery guy has a day job and just delivers cars on the side.

You might also want to find out if you are permitted to keep chickens. In many urban/suburban environments chickens (pets or not) are not allowed.